Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Non-Review: Daybreakers - Reviewed by Sister Anna Lucile

Daybreakers [Theatrical Release]People have a misconception about nuns. For some reason they think that just because we devote our lives to following God, that we can't enjoy the odd violent film. Actually I find that it helps to alleviate certain stresses that come about from a life of denying oneself things. In fact all the nuns at my convent feel the same way. Except for sister Suzie of course, who is still afraid of the dark and can often be found nipping into Father O'Brien's room around midnight, undoubtedly seeking reassurance.

The rest of us though even regularly put on plays; adaptations of current horror movies. Last year our parishioners were treated to a double billing of "Agnes of God" followed by "Friday the 13th." It wasn't quite as popular as we'd hoped. Still, nonplussed we shall press ahead this year with a "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" extravaganza.

Naturally when I was offered the chance to see an advance screening of "Daybreakers" I jumped at the chance. I have to tell you, it was better than sex. Just kidding, I saw that in "Sister Act" and always wanted to say it. In all seriousness though, the movie was flat out excellent. For those who don't know what the movie is about, let me give you a rundown.

The movie is set in a world where vampires have long ago taken control. Humans are treated like cattle, for the hungry masses. Trouble however is looming. It turns out that the vampires have depleted their human reserves and are faced with the inevitability of running out. With a deadline looming, scientists are ferociously working on finding an alternative food source. Added to this mix is the human equation. Those left in waiting to see their fate.

I found myself rooting for vampires to find an alternative food source, not because I wanted the humans to live, but because the vampires were such a likable bunch. It's not really their fault that they need blood to live. Besides, all those humans who die have a choice to go to heaven. Vampires on the other hand are doomed to burn in hell for eternity. So more power to them, I say.

If you're not a fan of blood in your movies than this one won't be for you. There was an adequate amount of gore as can be expected. However I thought there should have been more. It felt a little like they were holding out on us gorehounds. I want more heads being ripped off of hapless individuals. I want to see entrails thrown at the camera screen. At the very least, they could have thrown a couple disembowelings our way.

Still the story is very good, and oddly enough it reminded me how important my faith is to me. The vampire's struggle  for survival mirrored in my mind, the Catholic's struggle to maintain relevance in an ever paganistic world. If you have children this might be a good movie to see with them, so that afterwards you can talk to them about just this same issue. Though I would caution you not to take anyone under the age of 5 as some of the subject matter may be a little too scary for them.

If you love a good apocalyptic vampire movie as much as I do, than I can't recommend this enough. It's got everything; a fight for survival, gore, current events, politics, faith, and yes family values.

I give this movie a resounding 8 out of 10


  1. I have friends who went to Catholic school and from what I was able to gather from their experiences...Nuns have no aversion to violence.


  2. Thanks for the recommendation Penguin Lady. Best party I ever went to was the annual Nun's Party in Yellowknife. No word of a lie. Them bitches know how to rock.

  3. actually nuns are pretty cool. I remember this one time I was in a store and I saw two nuns in the bulk candy section discussing who liked what.

    Seeing a 70 year old nun with a large scooper full of gummy bears, is one of the greatest images of all time.

  4. I went to a catholic high school, but it was all fellas ... but on the guy side, they do have their habits. One of the Fathers had massive guns and spoke about 10 languages. Brainy meat heads are scary.

    Anyway - awesome post. I like the idea of an all nun, all the time, theatre.

  5. Priests with guns? Those are the guys I want to be with in the event of a Zombie apocalypse.

  6. Oh man ... maybe we should launch a blog called "priests with guns" and we'll alternate writing chapters.

    Actually now that I think about it that's a killer idea?

  7. HAHAHA that's awesome. Now I have to go look and see if someone's already done it. Seems like someone out there would have to have pictures.


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