Thursday, April 29, 2010
Non-Review: Human Centipede (First Sequence) - Reviewed by an 8 year old girl
As I sat in the theater I knew I was in the wrong one. There weren't any other kids there and the previews were for these weird looking movies I'd never heard of before. I was seated between two old fat guys who looked at me strangely before turning to watch the movie. I was nervous so I pretended like I was waiting for someone and that I belonged there. Then the movie started.
It was definitely not How To Train Your Dragon. It wasn't even a cartoon. The movie has these two ladies who get stranded when there car breaks down. They look around and find a house. Wait I forgot to mention they are in another country. I think Germany, cause my uncle is German. This house has a doctor in it and he seems helpful, but he's not.
They stay the night with him but when they wake up the morning they're trapped in a laboratory. There's a guy down there who is also trapped. I didn't understand everything the doctor says but I didn't have to, cause soon he does it, and I saw.
I covered my eyes with my hands a lot. But I kept peaking and eventually I couldn't help but look. It was so gross and scary. At one point I was looking at this woman crying while she was... I can't say. I couldn't watch so instead I looked at the fat guy to my left. He looked from the screen with a scared face and looked down at me. His face got worse looking at me. I don't know why but I think I made him uncomfortable. Maybe he was watching it by accident too. We spent the next couple minutes just looking at each other.
Finally the movie ended and I joined my group again. I don't think it was a good movie. It was gross and scary and now I'm afraid to go to sleep. Not cause of what happened to the people in the movie but because people liked the movie. At least I know the man beside me didn't enjoy it at all.