Friday, November 26, 2010

10 Things To Do On Black Friday

10. Look through all the sales papers at things you know you're not actually going to go out for. 

9. Make yourself a leftovers sandwich, drive around to stores, sit in the parking lot, and watch the melee. 

8. Text random friends about made up deals at various stores. Then show up to watch them get frustrated.

7. Sit in, writing up a list about things to do on Black Friday rather than doing them.

6. Watch a thousand holiday movies while you comatose on the couch. 

5. Put on a puppet show with the desiccated turkey carcass. 

4. Create an effigy of yourself out of leftovers, then drive yourself around town.

3. Show up at people's houses and ask them why they're not out shopping. 

2. Watch Groundhog's Day for the thousandth time and quote along line for for line. 

1. Sit inside and do anything but go shopping. 


  1. I wish we had Black Friday in Canada, I'd definitely be doing puppetry with the carcass of a dead bird.

    Groundhog Day is the best movie ever.

  2. This list is hysterical. Sounds like you have a lot more fun on Black Friday than most. I'd really like to try #8 sometime. #1, I always follow. Thanks. xo

  3. If you do number five, please tape the show for us!

  4. Glad you included that last one, because today I think I'll sit in bed and alternate between eating pumpkin pie and asparagus casserole, while I read your stupid blog and daydream about all the deals that are passing me by.

    No place I'd rather be, man.

  5. I do #10 all the time. It and the fact that people go absolutely nuts just cements the fact that buying things over the net is the way to go, haha.

    The groundhogs day sounds fun too. Love that movie. “Don't drive angry! Don't drive angry!”

  6. I do numbers 10 and 1.
    I refuse to leave the house today.
    In fact, I'm not going to get out of my pj's....

  7. #8 made me laugh out loud! I'm evil, aren't I?

  8. no way in h#ll am I hauling my @ss over the border on black friday, so I guess #1 works for me

  9. number 1 was my choice definately

  10. good list. fuck shopping, that's exactly what they want u to do.

    i've always thought it would awesome is EVERYONE boycotted the stores on black friday. the store owners would be scratching their heads o.O

  11. "Watch Groundhog's Day for the thousandth time" and quote it line for line--hey, that's sort of what Bill Murray's character does in the movie!

  12. I'm a sucker for having certain tv shows on DVD so I can throw them in whenever so I left the house ...

    But I wish I'd done #5.

  13. How about cutting out WIlford Brimley's mustache from last Sunday's coupon insert and place it on the people in the Black Friday ads. Yes, I have done this! We actually had a BrimStash on the lunch table at work for quite a while. It was always ready for action!


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