Friday, November 9, 2012

Skyfall, Lincoln: 7 Word Weekend

New Movie Releases Reviewed in 7 Words Each

Skyfall - Headhit Iconcuss Gohospital Getbandage Gohome Stayawake Suestudio.

Lincoln - Hal Holbrook? He was there wasn't he?

Just kidding Mr. Holbrook, no need to beat me with your cane. Again...

I know what you're thinking. My review for Skyfall had 14 words in it. No, no, no, that's not the case. See I just followed the example of the title. I can take any two words and make a compound out of them. Hooray for English! What's that? Science is feeling left out? Aw, alright than; hooray for science too. What's that math? Oh, I'm sorry, I'm all out of positive reinforcements, now get back in your corner.

I can understand the reasoning behind Lincoln's release this weekend, what with the whole election, thing. However, I guess the question is, how will it play against the new James Bond film? While it's been a highly anticipated film, do people really want more politics after being bombarded the last few months with thousands of political ads, surveys, and robo-calls? It'll certainly be interesting to see. I know one thing, Lincoln would never be elected if he ran today. But that's largely due to the fact that he's dead.

Bond on the other hand... Well, he's never going to die. Doesn't matter what you throw a him. Knives, nukes, bowler hats. The man keeps on ticking. He's a lot like Judi Dench that way, who legend has it, once dated Hal Holbrook back around the time slavery was abolished. Just kidding, Mr Holbrook, and Dame Judi Dench, no need to beat me with your respective cane and gold encrusted whip. Again...

I still hold that whip is ever impractical. 

For me what it comes down to is, while Lincoln is a film I'll want to see, why would I bother with it in a theater, when it'll be just as good on a TV screen, and I can watch things blow up in scale in front of my eyes? Hey, I'm a patriot. When I watch Lincoln, I'll be rooting for him to pull a Bond and somehow survive being shot. Just like how when they finally get around to making a movie about President Zachary Taylor, I'll be rooting for him not to eat cherries and milk.

Don't get the reference? Look it up, it's fun stuff. Hooray for history! GET BACK IN YOUR CORNER MATH!

Ahem... What are your plans this weekend?


  1. That's probably why they went for a limited release of Lincoln today, saving the wide release for next week. Which works for me, because I prefer one movie a weekend. So Skyfall this afternoon!

  2. Granted, but if you look at what's coming up in the next few weeks, I don't see it doing really huge numbers. Not that it has to. It's probably going to smoke the Oscars. I think it would have better releasing it last week.

  3. I wanted to see both of these movies but you have kind of talked me down from Lincoln by reminding me how much I don't want to see anything else political for awhile. So...waiting for DVD on that one. But Skyfall looks promising to me. My weekend unfortunately won't include it since I will be spending the whole weekend on kid birthday parties. My son's best friend's today, neighbor kid's tomorrow, and then my 6 year old will turn 7 on Sunday. So Chuck E Cheeses, Pump it up and happy kids are what I'm up to this weekend. Don't you wish you were me?!!? lol Hope you have a great weekend!!

  4. I actually really want to see Lincoln. Has a good cast that I am excited for.

  5. My dad used to tell that his dad's dad paid a nickel to see John Wilkes Booth's body. Said they carried it town to town with a glass window in the lid.

    The truth is just wrecking my family's stories. I found out that Booth was not even dead or is he?

  6. I will see them both...for clearly different reasons. DDL is going to be a superb Lincoln and Oscars may be in his future.

  7. I don't think Lincoln' beard and stovepipe hat would fit in nowadays and that is what would lose the election for him. Now if zombie Lincoln were running, that is a different story.

  8. I hear really good things about Lincoln though I get very annoyed with Spielberg and Lewis (who I find to be a little too intense). But I do love a good spectacle so I really should suck it up and see this on the big screen.

    Skyfall was great though it's really just a chase movie and not a James Bond movie. I have been waiting a long time for a more Mother/Son relationship between M and Bond and this one gave me that is spades.

  9. There will be people in the movie theater who don't know that Lincoln was shot, and they'll be stunned. 15 years back I saw Baz Luhrman's Romeo and Juliet, and about half the young audience was frantically urging on De Caprio and Danes to do whatever would save them...They were totally wrecked, some weeping when the two died. It was like watching the play with the first audience.


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