Monday, December 28, 2009

My favorite 9 movies of 2009 that I still haven't seen

Everyone else is doing a list of their favorite movies and as I was always taught to find what the cool kids are doing and copy them, I figured why not. Why nine instead of the full ten? Laziness. Some lazy excuse for a number wandered off from the list. I'd hoped its understudy could fill in, but unfortunately 7 is just not a good 8.
Anyways you may note that this list is of movies I haven't seen. I wanted to see these movies, just haven't had the chance yet.

Naturally this will not stop me from reviewing\recommending them.

10. Moon

If you haven't seen it, rent it now. This is sci-fi in its purest form. Sam Rockwell is fantastic as the sole human on an outpost on the moon. He manages the incredibly wicked character arc that the part requires, with a maturity only the best seasoned actors can manage. Also it's been awhile since I enjoyed Kevin Spacey in anything, and it was nice to see him in a refreshing role, as the robot voice.

Scene to watch for: Where Sam Rockwell realizes he's alone on the moon and reenacts the classic scene from 'Risky Business' with Bob Seger playing as he slides into a crater.

9. Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen

I actually did see this movie, however I thought it so very, very disappointing that I've decided it's best to pretend I haven't yet seen it. This way I can dwell in ignorance, imaging that one day I'll watch it and it'll be good. I mean come on, no one could take robots, explosions, classic 80's toonage, and create anything other than awesome.

Scene to watch for: Shia running. I'm pretty sure that only happens once in the movie.
Best line in the movie: "Bumblebee!" -Shia

7. Taking Woodstock

Demetri Martin taking on the role of Elliot Tiber, the man who was responsible for Woodstock. It died a quiet death when it was released, so it's not like I was the only one who didn't see it. I still think it looks like it should be a decent film. Even if there are hippies in it.

Favorite part of the movie: The part with the music and drug experiences.

6. G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

I realize this is the second movie on the list featuring 80's cartoon\toys on it, but what can I say, it's my childhood. Well sort of. I was still too young to really enjoy it at the time, but nevertheless still inherited a taste for it from my older brother. I suppose that's how it is with anyone who has siblings. You get hand-me-down music, movies, books ect. The point of the matter is, I was eager to see the movie.

Best dialog in the movie:
"You don't understand me." General Hawk
"I understand you only too well. I thought we really had something." Snake Eyes
"We do I just-" General Hawk
"General, I thought I'd find you here. Who's this?" Barbie doll
"Barbie, what are you doing here?" General Hawk
"I got lonely in our dream house." Barbie
"This is who you've been cheating on me with?" Snake Eyes
"Barbie and I were both missing something in our relationships. We found that in each other." General Hawk

5. 500 Days of Summer

Oh those wacky hipsters living their edgy little artistic lives. I sometimes wish I could see the world through an indie lens. The world would be quirky and jaded and I'd be crowned 'king of the midnight pool runners.' I don't know to what the title would apply to, but that doesn't matter, 'cause it's part of the charm. I'd hook up with a trippy girl who's equal parts hippie artist, intellectual and saccharine personified. Everything would be one giant snow globe of perfection. I kid, this movie is supposed to be pretty great.

Best scene in the movie: Where the girl does something wacky that appeals to the guy who's just outside of normal.

4. Cold Souls

If you're a fan of Paul Giamatti, (you know you are, why would you lie like that?) Then you have to see this film. In Cold Souls, Giamatti plays himself. Anxiously agonizing over his portrayal of Uncle Vanya, he turns to a new company that extracts souls and stores them for you. Souls, he finds out, are about the size of a pea. Unfortunately, his soul is stolen by a trafficker who sells it to a Russian soap star. Oh yes.

Best scene in the movie: When Giamatti is served a bowl of split pea soup and turns pale at the thought of eating people's souls.
Best line in the movie: "Waiter, there's a fly in my soul!"

3. Coraline

I didn't see it but I'm familiar with the source material, so I could actually give you a real synopsis. But I ask you, what would be the fun in that? The animation for this looked stunning, and I love the story. I heard the 3D was fantastic and I'm sure that would add to the overall experience. Interesting fact, for some reason I can't see 3D. Possibly because of an astigmatism, but who knows. It's never occurred to me to actually ask an optometrist at the same time same time I've been in one's office. C'est la vie.

Best 30 seconds in the film: "Other Father Song" by They Might be Giants. (and don't tell me you could just listen to the song, cause that's what I did.)

2. Zombieland

I'm not generally big on Zombie movies. But anytime it involves comedy, I'm there. Well, except when I'm not, which is actually quite frequently. 'Cause I mean, how would I have time to do anything If I was forever watching comedic Zombie films? Seriously people, you need to learn to not take things so literally.

Greatest cameo of the year: Yeah I won't ruin it for you if you haven't seen it. Someone already ruined it for me and I was more than a little miffed.

1. 2012

Nothing better than a little Mayan mayhem. This movie was great because it featured a storyline so bold I couldn't believe I was watching it unfold before my eyes. You'd expect some natural disaster thing from the previews, but that's only part of it. The movie starts with the Mayans being raised from the dead by some creepy German scientist. It then focuses on John Cusack and his family trying to outrun the destruction these beings cause. Packed with heartwarming scenarios and slapstick jokes, by the end of it you'll be saying to yourself "if that's how the world is going to end, sign me up."

Performance to savor: Jonah Hill as the lovable Mo, a Mayan flunky looking to prove himself.

So that's it. One cannot watch all the movies that come out each year (unless you're a paid movie critic, in which case I guess you do.) But that's why DVD and lazy nights were created. So how about you, what movies did you miss, that you're looking forward to catching up on?


  1. Moon and Cold Soul and 500 look awesome. I've wanted to see Moon so badly. And Coraline was just off the hook.

  2. Sounds like a good recommendation to me. I actually want to see Moon and Coraline most, but I really just arranged the list according to what popped into my head first.

  3. OMG I saw all of those and you pretty much hit the nail on the head with all of them. That is sad.

  4. Let's not say sad, that's part of the fun of doing the non-reviews, seeing how close I can get.

  5. Our lists have quite a bit in common! Except for the non-seeing them part of course. The non-reviews are all pretty accurate.


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