Battle of the Mascots: Semi Finals 1 of 2

After a surprisingly close battle early on, Santa then apparently gave his reindeer some steroids and was able to finish strong. So congrats, Mr. Claus, on your victory, and we’ll see you again in the next round. But our current round is about to start, so we must turn our attention elsewhere.

Now, one of our next two contestants might be a surprise to people who have been following along. In the very first battle a mistake was made and then quickly corrected, but not before some voters read the error. Jack-O-Lantern actually won, but his opponent was incorrectly named the victor. An update was immediately issued, but we here at the Non-Review take our mistakes very seriously, so we punished ourselves by banging our heads against a wall until the police showed up. (Apparently the noise was bothering people.)

As far as we know, the head-banging did not affect our sanity in any way, though admittedly it would be like trying to tell the difference between an alive rock and a dead rock. (Man, my head still hurts.) But there’s no time for further medical tests because our next competition is upon us:

Halloween’s
JACK-O-LANTERN
VS.
Easter’s
EASTER BUNNY

Non-Review: If you had to eat a rotten tomato on the back of a galloping zebra using nothing but chopsticks, would you prefer to use salt or pepper?
Jack: “Dude, you are weird. Did you hit your head, or something? That’s bizarre even for Halloween. But I only dish out fear, I don’t experience it myself, so I’ll answer your question. I wouldn’t eat it at all, because I don’t believe in cannibalism. Vegetables don’t eat vegetables. It’s a code we live by.”
Non-Review: A tomato is a fruit, not a vegetable.
Jack: “Fine. I don’t like tomatoes, okay? Thanks for telling the world. I don’t need this kind of harassment—I’ve got a contest to focus on. Interview over.”

Non-Review: Do you prefer chocolate or strawberry milkshakes?
EB: “What?! Jack gets a question from the twilight zone, and I get asked about milkshakes! What, you think I can’t handle it, or something? Give me a real question.”
Non-Review: If you were making a stew, would you make it using Thumper or The Velveteen—
EB: “Forget it, I’m leaving.”

   
The weight of this contest now turns to you. Vote for who you think is the greater Holiday Mascot by leaving a comment, or sending an email. The winner of this round will be announced on Tuesday, and the two other previous winners will then come out and face each other.