Tuesday, May 11, 2010

10 things I've learned from the flood




10. Apparently I'm allergic to peanuts.

9. No matter what you think, you're not water soluble.

8. Rats don't necessarily know where to go.

7. Kroger's sucks.

6. Showtime has better shows, but HBO has better movies.

5. That's not a Hershey's bar.

4. Best Western sucks.

3. I don't ever want to die with Keene stuck in my head.

2. Tennessee has it in for me.

1. Unknown new grey kitty survives!

16 comments:

  1. But what if it was a Hershey's bar? I think taking a bite is the only way to find out.

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  2. Tennessee *does* have it in for you! Move to Texas, we'll treat you right! You can write this blog from ANYWHERE...earning a living might be a little more tricky?

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  3. I have visions of a grey kitty surfing a chocolate bar to victory.

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  4. Let's see:
    I have no idea who/what Keene is, but I'll take your advice.
    I already knew the Best Western thing.
    Tennessee means "The Land of Non-Henriks," (paraphrased) so that should have been your first clue.
    And you completely smashed my whole belief system about rats. Who do I follow now? Floating peanuts and Hershey bars?

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  5. I'm glad kitty survived... not so stoked about that non-Hershey's bar... but I bet you weren't either! Ew.

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  6. Oh my god, I just imagined dying with "Somewhere Only We Know" stuck in my head, and it made me want to shoot myself.

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  7. At least you have a positive outlook...if nothing else.

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  8. as a new followerer, i have to say taht:
    1. keene does kind of suck.
    2. im SO GLAD a kitty (regardless of color) has survived. all kitties everywhere need to survive (and if they cant/if my husband would let me, they could all come and stay with me).
    3. sorry about the flood, man. that sucks harder than keene.

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  9. RMb, I love the kitties. This one showed up the night before the major flooding and then disappeared into the bushes of the creek. I didn't see it again until the night after. It was walking around the parking lot of the motel I stayed at. I was so happy to see the little fella.

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  10. Fact, Krogers really is an asshole, what kind of dicks would lock the doors when people were at risk of death by poopie water..

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  11. good to know!!

    and I'm crushin' on ya cause you included the kitten..and that was sweet....

    just sayn'

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  12. Ok - I gotta go back and finish reading....I just hit the brakes on "That's not a Hershey Bar" and had to come down here and laugh for a minute!

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  13. Is unknown new grey kitty going to be taken in by the Hendrik clan? He can be the Non-Review mascot!

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  14. So what was it if it isn't a Hersey's Bar? And how far did you go before realizing the rats didn't know where to go?

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  15. LOL! this was hilarious!!!! i'm glad the kitty survived. i think it survived for YOU to be it's new daddy. did you EAT the "non hershey bar" only to find out it was not a hershey bar? or did you smell it? either way, i'm not entirely sure i want to know how you found out it wasn't a hershey bar.

    that's also what my stepdad said when he pooped in the pool on vacation.... (he says it was me.... it wasn't. i promise)

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