Friday, June 29, 2012

Magic Mike, Ted, Tyler Perry, and I go off topic: 7 Word Weekend Review

New Movie Releases Reviewed in 7 Words Each

Magic Mike - I've no desire to see Channing's Tatum.

People Like Us - Suuuurrree they do... Keep telling yourself that.

Ted - Dang it, it's not about Ted Baxter...

Tyler Perry's Madea's Witness Protection - Personal Tagline: TS's Hendrik's Just's Doesn't's Cares's

I felt like I was under a contractional obligation to do that last joke. And if that last sentence just made you groan at the pun, well then hang on cause today's going to be a bumpy ride.


Yes, I'm in a sanity be damned mood today. You might have guessed that already. Maybe it's fueled by my homemade pizza induced dreams of last night. I was a secret agent, infiltrating some something or other, and had that obligatory scene of trying to upload the information to my USB thingy (note to self, read dictionary today, you're running out of words again). There were various, nefarious and precarious (wait, found the words, they just all rhyme) people lurking about. They were searching for me, knowing that I was on their compound, which was in a mall (I dream of malls a lot, and I hate them, I wonder what that means). I managed to get everything loaded onto two USB thingies an-

Okay wait, this requires stopping a sec, it never occurred to me before but I guess the plural of "thingy" is in fact "thingies". I did it without even thinking but Chrome's spell check didn't try to correct. Go fig.

So anyway... There I am trying to get out when they suddenly come around the corner and spot me. They start chasing me and just when it seems like they're about to catch me... They do. The end.  Right, shall we talk movies?

Yes, Magic Mike has received praise. Yes, it's Soderbergh. Yes, I'm comfortable enough with myself to deal with male nudity in a film. No, I don't want to see it. Despite the positive buzz, it just doesn't interest me in the least. Nor does Tyler Perry's latest Madea crap-fest or the Chris Pine driven People Like Us. I do want to see Ted, despite the fact that I haven't liked anything Seth MacFarlane helmed in several years. But come on, it's a living teddy bear that everyone treats as normal everyday occurrence. That's just awesome. 

What are your plans for the weekend? 
I hope the day finds you more sane then it did me.


  1. I'm seeing Magic Mike with a friend tomorrow. We're ditching our kids with our husbands. I'm just so....drawn to it for some reason. Some reason I just can't explain *cough*Channing Tatum's ass*cough*

    I agree about Ted. I want to see it just because it seems so bonkers.

  2. My plans for the weekend are NOT to see any of these movies. That goes for next weekend too. The one after that as well.
    Maybe if the one was about Ted Baxter, it might be worth seeing.

  3. I like Seth very much when I see him in interviews but Family Guy and American Dad just grate on me. I think I would feel the same way about Ted. I hear there is an extended fight scene and all I can see is Peter and that stupid chicken. I am not the target demographic for Magic Mike and I couldn't be happier about that.

  4. I'm kind of interested in Ted, but only because it looks like a live action version of Family Guy, only smarter. It just seems like the same set up that Seth usually does. He needs to branch out.

    I'll fucking see it regardless because I love him.


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